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DISCLAIMER: This site is in no way affiliated with the Monkees or personal relations thereof. All fan fiction and fan art is intended for entertainment purposes only and no defamation of character is intended whatsoever. To break it down one more time: It's all just for fun, folks.

"The Nightwatch Monkee"

Title: The Nightwatch Monkee

Author: HunyR0ry

Genre: Comedy/Action

Rating: G

Disclaimer: Total fiction, this never happened

Summary: The Monkees tangle with a greedy businessman

"What do you mean, Mr Bushwacker.  You aren't going to pay us!"  Mike Nesmith clenched his fists

"You've got it in one, kid!"  The hard-faced businessman stared back coldly.

"Some of your long-haired weirdo friends broke furniture and stole drinking glasses from the club I rented for your concert.  It all costs money!"

"That's rubbish!"  Davy Jones countered.  "The furniture was broken already and we had to buy our own glasses from the supermarket!"

"Yeah!"  Micky Dolenz agreed.  "We've got right and the law on our side!"

Bushwacker grinned.  I've got him on my side!"  He pointed to the large, fierce dog chained to the wall beside his desk.  "Now beat it and stop spoiling my day!"

"That's not fair!"  Davy lunged forward and was greeted by a set of sharp teeth.  He retreated smartly.

"Brutus hasn't been fed today!  Now scram!"

The three Monkees ran from the office building and across the works site to their car.


"Nice going, Davy!"  Mike sat down at the wheel.

"Sorry Mate, but he made me so angry!"

Micky sighed.  "Me too, but I didn't want to see if that dog had a taste for English shrimps!"

Davy grinned in spie of himself and punched him lightly on the arm.

"We'll have to break this gently to Peter....."

Mike started up the engine.  "It won't do his upset stomach any good!"


When they arrived at the Pad they found Peter reading the local paper.

"How are you doing, Big Pete?"  Mike asked.

"I feel much better.  I managed to keep some cerealt down this morning!"

Peter's upset tummy had meant he'd been unable to play Bushwackers' concert the previous night.

"You won't be able to stomach this!"  Micky told him about Bushwacker.

Peter's lip quivered.  "He was mean, threatening you with his dog like that!"

Mike picked up the paper and riffled through it.  He stopped suddenly.

"Will y'all look at this!  Bushwacker is looking for a new nghtwatchman for his factory!"

Mike, Micky and Davy exchanged cunning glances and Mike placed a hand on Peter's shoulder.

"Peter, ol' buddy, what do you reckon to a whole new career.......?"


Two nights later Bushwacker's new nightwatchman, Peter Tork arrived at the factory.

The businessman had been pleased with Peter believing him to be gullible and dim.  Always a man with an eye for an advantage he hired him immediately.

For the first nigh Peter reported to the current watchman, Hank Warren.

Hank was in his sixties and not sorry to be retiring.  "That Bushwacker is a twisted bastard and a cheat!  Pardon my language.  He even cut back on my pay beacause I was sick for a month last Winter!"

Peter shook his head.  "I'll see if I can do something."

"I wish you luck.  He's an expert in finding loopholes!"


The new watchman always turned up on time and was unfailingly polite and helpful.

There was a problem, however.  Someone was stealing from the factory and Peter couldn't find out who it was.

"I'm sorry, Mr Bushwacker!"  Peter said tearfully as he pushed his wheelbarrow through the factory gates at the end of his shift.  "I'll do better tomorrow..."

Bushwacker scowled.  "I'll give you another week, then you're out!"


At the end of the week Peter was met by Bushwacker, two of his 'heavies' and Brutus.

"Tork, you're a usless watchman and I'm firing you!"

Peter trembled.  "Oh please, Mr Bushwacker!  Give me another chance!"

"You can have five minute to pick up your wheelbarrow, then I'm letting Brutus off his chain!  Out!"


The next morning Mike counted up the money they'd made.  It came to $100.

"You know.  I never realise wheelbarrows were worth so much money!"  Davy grinned.

"There's enough here to give Hank the money Bushwacker owed him, too!"  Peter beamed.

The Monkees all 'high fived' each other and cheered.